You want that “’til death do us part”.  The fighting just needs to stop so that you can start connecting again.  It seems like you keep missing each other.  You want to like your spouse again, to rekindle the marriage, to feel like you did when you first started dating.

But slowly things got harder.  The wedding day got closer.  Living with someone who snores the first year was tough.  And you started the hustle and bustle of having children.  Maybe you dealt with an addiction or some bad habits along the way.  Maybe the kids are gone now and you are trying to remember the person that you married.

You think your partner doesn’t understand you and you keep running into the same fight over and over.  You feel stuck.  You really don’t like him right now.  It’s almost like you are just roommates instead of teammates.  But you are worried about other finding out about your marital problems, things ending in divorce, or worse yet…staying married to someone you “hate” at the moment.

Is it really possible that we can get back to the way things used to be?

 

 

COUPLES COUNSELING CAN HELP

 

Most marriages fail within the first 7 years.  The average couple waits 6 years before getting professional help from a marriage counselor, according to research at the Gottman Institute.  Six years is way too long to wait – not only because you lose the window to save your marriage – but because that is a lot of time to stress about something that should bring you joy!

The American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists found that 93 percent of clients said they had more effective tools for dealing with relationship problems after working with a couples counselor.

Some couples seek therapy to adjust to big changes in their lives, others are experiencing major issues and are on the brink of divorce, and others are just wanting to improve and strengthen the relationship they already have.

 

COMMON REASONS TO SEEK MARRIAGE COUNSELING:

 

• Difficulty becoming a “we” while keeping your individual dreams alive
• Communication problems
• Money issues
• Sexual conflict
• Difficulty sharing responsibilities
• Anger and anxiety issues
• Substance abuse
• Issues with having children or blended families
• Infidelity

Couples counseling can especially be helpful if one partner is experiencing porn addiction or sex addiction or if a history of trauma is creating barriers and blocking intimacy.

We understand that the decision to go to marriage counseling can be difficult.  And your confidentiality is extremely important to us.  But if your relationship is going through some rough storms, reaching out is far more effective than waiting for the storm to pass.  Taking the first step to seek counseling is the hardest part, but the vast majority find counseling to be more fun, insightful, and healing than they expected.

 

WHAT HAPPENS IN COUPLES COUNSELING SESSIONS?

 

Marriage counseling is about creating intimacy that has its solid foundation in friendship and mutual respect.  At Abba Healing Services, we’re trained in Gottman Couples Method techniques to help you learn how to discover the other’s world, give mutual respect, navigate conflict and create shared purpose.  We’ll help you gain skills to maintain your relationship outside of the counseling office.  You will be relieved and surprised to find that you can navigate arguments that previously would have ended in nuclear implosion…well, you get what I mean.

 

 

WE KNOW THERE ARE THINGS KEEPING YOU FROM STARTING COUPLES COUNSELING.

 

MY PARTNER DOESN’T WANT TO COME TO COUPLES COUNSELING

 

This is a common issue for couples.  Remember that it is important to choose your words, timing, and approach to discussing therapy wisely.  They will be far more open to trying marriage counseling if you give them time to think about their answer.  Gradually work on them over time, without expecting an immediate “yes.”  When possible, you want to enter couples counseling with a united front to work on the relationship issues.  Letting your partner come to the decision to go to counseling on their own will improve your chances of that happening.

If they persist in avoiding couples therapy, you can come to learn conflict management and emotion regulation on your own.  It is difficult to manage your relationship on your own, but there are still benefits to be gained such as discovering your own habits, learning motivations behind your spouse’s behavior, and uncovering healthy responses to your partner’s behavior.

 

MY PARTNER AND I AREN’T MARRIED, WILL COUPLES COUNSELING WORK FOR US?

 

You better believe it!

Couples counseling can be a great way to prepare a couple for marriage or to identify potential issues within the relationship.  You can learn to communicate better, trust one another, and increase your commitment toward one another.

 

WE HAVE TOO MUCH GOING ON RIGHT NOW FOR COUPLES COUNSELING

 

We get it, couples with kids or careers have extremely busy lives.  But if your relationship issues continue to get worse leaving you both angry and bitter toward each other, making a few hours to navigate these issues now could save you time, money, and anguish.  Ask yourself, can anything on that to do list be bumped down the road because it is far less important than your relationship?  And do your other responsibilities depend on you having a stable and happy marriage?

 

ISN’T COUPLES COUNSELING REALLY EXPENSIVE?

 

Committing to marriage counseling is an investment and we don’t take that for granted.  Couples counseling is also the place to restore your relationship and make it better than it has ever been.  We think that is something worth investing in.  Abba Healing Services has helped multiple couples in the Owensboro, KY and Western Kentucky area revive their relationship from the brink of divorce, heal from affairs, and we can help you and your partner, too.  Take a look at your family budget and discuss payment options, like using HSA or FSA cards, with your couples counselor.

 

WHAT YOU CAN EXPECT FROM MARRIAGE AND COUPLES COUNSELING

 

At Abba Healing Services, an Owensboro KY counseling practice servicing the people of Western Kentucky, we promise to help you get through the resentment and constant arguments.  We’ll guide you through the emptiness and loneliness to help you rekindle the love you once had and fan the flame into a roaring fire until the last ember.

You’ll be amazed by the difference having a thorough, professional, and caring counselor can make in untangling the wire around your relationship.  As an Owensboro counseling practice with trained couples therapists and marriage counselors, we can help you feel in love again, so you’ll walk away as a “we” instead of just “me.”

 

 

GETTING STARTED WITH COUPLES COUNSELING IS EASY:

 

1. Get in touch with Abba Healing Services to set up your first appointment by calling or online here.
2. Get connected with a couples counselor you can trust.
3. Find deeper love and feel like you did when you started dating.

 

As an Owensboro counseling practice, our skilled therapists also offer parenting and family therapy, porn addiction and sex addiction treatment, and PTSD or trauma counseling.  And telehealth or online counseling is available.  We also offer mental health wellness tips on our blog.  Contact us or schedule with a marriage counselor Owensboro and Western Kentucky!